ineedhobbie

Why do most hobbies cost money? Why can't the world we live in reward our creativity by making fun things free? Painting, photography, crocheting, and even make-up all cost money. I think the one hobby that I have access to, and is also free is writing. The Art of WORDS. But I think I am real shit at it. Even if I write on and on and into infinity I will eternally be shit. So the cheapest and I guess easiest hobby that probably won't make me feel good about myself is the Art of WORDS. I will surely get my moneys worth, $0. What can I possibly put into words that is as beautiful and thought provoking as a picture or a yarn mitten? It's not like there's an Etsy for nice words. So what am I to do? I have that creative writing minor so I should really just go for it. Inhale. Exhale. Words.

eenie meenie miney mo

i once punched an ugly ho

she was fat and cheap as shit

i shoved her face into a pit

she spat out dirt and turned to me

"you're a shit writer, cant you see?"

I know fictional ho, I know...

the motivation to move on

If I try to look back at my past relationships and flings like the big events that they were and bring them to the now, they are blurry. They are globs of wet paint poured out on to a canvas, mixed and muddled. There is no timeline, no beginning and end. The brights stand out as much as the darks. There is the color obsession mixed in with the color love. The color agony mixed in with the color laughter. Shame and purity. Some minuscule colors escape to their own private corners of the canvas and are very clear and vivid and I remember them well. But I cherish the whole painting because I can call it my own.